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I forgive you all and myself for being rotting stinking piles of flesh and fences, I think it really repels people when I have that kind of attitude, I only realized recently, and I'm ready to change right now. Perfectionism is a curse, and it's not cute.
I'd look at people and myself and see garbage, this started in my childhood and is associated with my radical hippie grandparents telling me in private that all human beings wete garbage, not to be trusted, filth, evil, trash, and that animals were better than people.