I still remember, the last huge argument with my step mom.

Repeated arguments over the length of 15 years had ruined my self esteem to the point, where a truly crazy thought crossed my mind. I couldn't live a single second without knowing the answer to.

So, I grabbed a knife and put it into her hand without her noticing. (This might sound strange, but it is possible.)

Of course, the moment, she noticed she was holding a knife, she had put it down immediately.

But to this day, it drives me crazy to know what I did. I was less afraid of death, then living with someone who I wasn't sure if she wants me dead.