It's bizarre to think that I still get confused by contact-oriented questions. I thought this was already a closed page in my life. I think I'll see a psychologist again so I can talk about this again.
@AbNormal @LukeAlmighty I should see children as people who cannot consent to any situation involving a sexual/romantic relationship. Since I'm having these doubts means I'm acknowledging that maybe I could be wrong and that maybe there are situations where they really can consent.
This is objectively a cognitive distortion. Since my feelings are blinding me to the cruel reality of childlike nature I need the help of a professional to help me see things as they really are again. Even if that reality is painful in some way.
I cannot and must not feed false hopes within myself.
If you let a kid display their freedom and intelligence, they will. It is only through the programming of today's society that they become dulled to their true selves.
@AbNormal @LukeAlmighty "Why should you see them in this way, when there is so much proof otherwise?"
What exist are anecdotal experiences, I don't want to invalidate these experiences, but they are not enough.
If it were one child, sure
If it were tens, hundreds, maybe
But it's thousands
Tens of thousands of children, from all walks of life, from the richest elites to the lowest of lows
That's too many to just dismiss them as anecdote
Sure not all kids are the same way, but is that not the case with adults as well? Treat every child as a unique individual, and take your time with every one.
@nate_river @AbNormal
That is... admirable.
I am not sure why you would need a therapist for that though, since you know about the issue yourself.
@LukeAlmighty @AbNormal Well, I'm changing my mind. I am attracted to children. Maybe in time I'll stop seeing this as a cognitive distortion and start thinking it's a fact.
That would open a door of possibilities that I don't want to open. I was once more inclined to believe that children could consent when I was a teenager. If I make up my mind about this it will probably be hard to convince myself otherwise.
@nate_river @AbNormal
Either way, thanks for sharing, and keep on fighting.
I know it isn't an easy life with this condition. 
@LukeAlmighty Cases of positive results when it comes to inappropriate sexual/romantic relationship between adults and children confuse me.
Tbh it's always did I just stopped thing about it over time.