I did my makeup for the first time in like 3 years and I did a horrible job idk how to even do it nobody taught me and youtube videos are hard to follow along with, I'm sure I look like a disgusting freak who everyone hates because I went down the tranny alt right pipeline and now I have self hating feelings when I didn't before because I internalized the group dynamics bullshit and so if you're an alt right tranny GET AWAY FROM THOSE PEOPLE THEY ONLY PRETEND TO BE YOUR FRIEND THEY ARE NOT YOUR FRIEND IF THEY CALL YOU NAMES AND VICTIMIZE YOU!! but anyway I understand why nobody would like me I'm a freak who was too stupid to stay where it belonged and now I have noone irl who is a friend. I am so isolated and scared irl. Oh and I could only do my makeup because my family is gone who swears they aren't transphobic but they fucking are, they say little shit to me because they think I'm not trans about how kids are being tricked into being trans and shit and it makes me fucking sick to have to pretend and just be like "Well who knows, people decide what they decide, you know?" and they snap back with shit like "NO, they're being MANIPULATED!" and this is a fucking person who has power over "vulnerable" kids and gives them life advice and shit and it makes me sick to wonder what kind of values they could be giving these kids.