When I was a kid all I wanted was an adult who was both attracted to me and a safe person, I longed for a gay well kempt gentleman in his 20s-40s to give me kisses secretly in his beautiful home, in his giant bed. I wanted to be his, I wanted him to talk to me about practical things, and to be kind and sensitive, I wanted him to protect me from my parents eccentricities and delusions, I wanted him to gain their trust so he could get their permission to take me away with him, to a safe, calm, loving place in the woods or near a beach. In my fantasies we would snuggle, and cuddle, and kiss, and he would smell like lavender and citrus, he would be beautiful and clean shaven and smiling. He would wear nice clothes and would have a position of authority and respect and my parents would trust him and so nothing would ever be said about the grown man with the young teen cutie who married as soon as he was 18, surely nothing was going on behind the scenes that anyone would classify as untoward :3