The Babylon Bee @babylonbee@gameliberty.club

WASHINGTON, D.C. — Global tensions over tariffs continued to rise amid the ongoing trade war, as the White House announced that General Tso's Chicken would be renamed…

DALLAS, TX — Though the week began with exciting news of a scientific breakthrough in reviving a long-gone species of animal, the brand-new dire wolves were reported…

U.S. — With investors pleasantly surprised that a crash has thus far been avoided and the market had rebounded in the wake of new trade tariffs, top analysts clarified…

WASHINGTON, D.C. — According to sources, Associate Justice Amy Coney Barrett adopted an MS-13 gang member as a show of support for the much maligned community of…

PHOENIX, AZ — In a move intended to fix what experts cited as a years-long imbalance, a local man announced that he was imposing tariffs after his wife had racked…

The abortion debate remains an ever-present hot topic across the United States, with advocates often pointing to the potentially dangerous consequences people could…

Fam, let's get real. You may be excited about Switch 2, but have you considered making the "Switch 2" Jesus?

WASHINGTON, D.C. — President Trump addressed concerns about the stock market Monday, ensuring the American people that the economy was stronger than ever while wearing…

SEATLE, WA — The parents of local kid Liam Larper were in for a bit of a surprise this week when they walked in on their son visiting a Great Fairy Fountain in The…

U.S. — Millions of people took to the streets over the weekend to demand more, not less, government waste.

WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a move political analysts say was an olive branch to the LGBTQ community, President Donald Trump hosted the Los Angeles Dodgers at the White…

BEIJING — As part of an escalating global trade war, the Chinese government announced plans to retaliate against President Donald Trump's tariffs by putting worse…

BOULDER, CO — Local church drummer Sam Huddleston continues to make up for his stark lack of talent by playing with an incredible excess of volume.

ANNAPOLIS, MD — Local financial advisor Rick Rosas announced that now was the time for utter panic and urged his clients to hastily make huge money moves based on…

WASHINGTON, D.C. — WNBA legend Elena Delle Donne announced her retirement yesterday, the former MVP leaving after a decade-long career which saw her score six points.

MEMPHIS, TN — Local teenager Kayleigh Taylor has begun to wonder when her parents will finally grow out of the awkward stage they're in.

WASHINGTON, D.C. — With the nation anxious about the ramifications of widespread tariffs, President Trump assured Americans that everything would be settled down…

SIOUX FALLS, SD — Local man Thomas Woodward suddenly ramped up his Lenten observance this past week, completely giving up having money in his retirement account.

Watching your retirement account tumble as $10 trillion in market value evaporates can be a stressful experience. Here are seven facts to make you feel at ease as…

BEND, OR — The leaders of River of Life Church were bewildered that the congregation's men appeared to be struggling spiritually more than ever despite the church…