Welp, I think that's it. Laptop is just refusing to boot to the BIOS. Little guy lasted 4 years, $200 cobbled together thing. RIP. Don't have money for a new one so idk wtf I'm gonna do for D&D for the next few months, gonna have to haul my whole PC upstairs probably.

@beardalaxy maybe it's just a problem with the RAM?

@keisuke yeah I'll have to open it up and kind of reseat stuff to see if it works, but the problem is probably much worse noe. I thought it was an issue with the bios firmware so I installed that, reset the computer and it didn't turn back on. Usually it only takes a few attempts to turn on so that's why I thought it was some weird bios bug. But you know, not restarting to update the bios is pretty much a death sentence.