Here's my hot take for the night:

writing in books is borderline criminal unless they are books you printed and bound yourself or are books so cheap, old, and used they have not much time left for the world
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@sampler people just have no respect for things that are available to the public.

@beardalaxy I have bought many, many used books throughout my life and none of them were improved by people underlining and highlighting everything (this is a habit that they usually give up in the first 1/3 of book thankfully)

My collection of 50+ year old books (including 100+ year old books) are all unspoiled by graffiti which I am deeply grateful for ....

Similarly I sold/given up many books of mine I have purchased new and I am sure that everyone whose hands they fell into were grateful for fresh books.

My parents were English Lit professors so I could understand them scribbling in cheap paperbacks they were using for classes. Their scribbles actually benefited me when I read their books because I was basically getting university-level insight into texts from a solo reading experience. But that is the exception that proves the rule.

For books I've either taught or critiqued seriously, keeping a notebook on my desk as I read was a perfect solution. Reach an interesting passage, mark the page number in the notebook and comment with my thought. Then after I finish reading the book I can just skim through my notes page to find my way back to the "juicy" bits. Book remains pure + finding my points of interest becomes much simpler.
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