b e a r d
i sometimes think i'm a big ol' degenerate but at least i pay my own bills, buy my own food, live away from home, positively contribute to society, and have some semblance of integrity and public decency. i still have some friends that live with their parents and go to college doing pretty much nothing with their lives and i'm almost 30. wtf man.
@beardalaxy Hmm, man, a lot of the time I feel like I'm pretty much that type of bum. It sucks. It sucks not to have willpower to be able to act with some sort of responsibility. I'm almost 30 and have a year of college left. And yeah, I'm 100% dependent financially on my parents... I don't know, never found inspiration as a teenager. First attempt at college was a nightmare. So it's hard to figure out what profession you want to do when you grow up a bit sheltered, or coddled, or being pushed towards believing you can put off personal development until an ambiguous point in the future. ("You'll learn this in college.") And it turns into a fucked up fear of having that responsibility or independence. I can cook and clean and stuff fine, but will my dumb degree in a field I just fell into on a whim actually be able to help me live on my own, especially with how shitty things are getting in the world? It's like prisoners not knowing how to function in life outside of prison. The fear of going out into the world is certainly unfounded, but even knowing that I still look at life after college with a lot of anxiety.
I dunno, sorry for the semi blogpost, just really making me reflect.
@arc well my advice to you, in your current position, would be to just stick out college where you're at right now and then try your best to become financially independent/stable. given how shitty the housing market is right now i can understand staying with your parents if it is going to be really hard to find some place you can afford. as long as you're actively working and contributing to society though instead of just leeching from it, it's fine if you're still living with your parents for the time being. you're in a kind of crappy position right now but that doesn't mean it can't get better!