YZZAJ @Jazzy_Butts@gameliberty.club

What if god was just some alcoholic college prodigy who stood on the shoulders of giants and then created our universe and then left us on a shelf and forgot about us

"Mister Jazzy" they would call me, because I hadn't reached the rank of master yet and probably wouldn't for a long time.

@Sp nkst? Everything else I understand

I feel like I'm on the edge of something in my life and I'll either get it right or...
https://youtu.be/gY5gkkfaHL8

I realized now I have to do the same for myself. I'm not worthless, I'm not nothing. I have to be for myself who I was for those students.

I trained lots of younglings, never once did I do or even think anything creepy about them, they were my students and I was a good teacher, their joy was my joy, their accomplishment was my accomplishment, I felt good when they succeeded, I felt good when I could see the spark return to their eyes, these kids who came in defeated, thinking yhey were worthless. I tried my hardest to make it clear to them they weren't worthless, and I think I made a difference in a few.

@AcrylicFairy@freak.university Thankyou have good sleep

When I was a child I was introduced to a man, who I called master. His name was always preceded by "master". I looked up to this man, I obeyed him to the best of my ability, but my home life was not great, and I was falling apart emotionally. I got into bad things to take the pain away. I hung out with bad people, wasted time, stopped going to train with my master, because I felt like he wouldn't even want me around. So I sank, deeper and deeper, until I was in a hole with bad people. And eventually I stop answering the bad people, and they left me, and I'm still trying to pick up the pieces.

@errante I hope we both learn to hope and trust again and that we hope and trust rightly

@Sp I'll try, but everyone is so emotionless now, it's like they all know they're trapped in a Kafkaesque hell

@driftwood Gott have a strong immune system if she's with me :p

As a kid we would go rent movies and the place always had seagulls flying above. It was really weird because we were a ways from the ocean and any water ways and the gulls weren't anywhere in the surrounding areas until you got near the water. It was like a seagull oasis. Very weird.

I really love soldering and am not very good at programming or engineering (yet?) so maybe I'll get into jewlery making or stained glass window making. That way I could get to do a lot of soldering? But idk yet.

https://youtu.be/lOF7XZsY9qg

How do I unlearn the belief that human beings only stick around until something better comes along, then it's see ya later?

If my gf asked for juice and it was the last one I would give it to her without hesitation, no matter how bad I wanted the juice myself

I should try and attract someone like me who values actions more than looks, instead of trying to make money to attract people...I have a hard time believing they're out there though

I awake now