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@icedquinn
No... this is precisely what I would have expected. Women have no evolutionary pressure to select for happy men. They evolved to select for successful and powerful men. That's pretty much it. Men's emotions don't play much of a role in that. The slight pride uptick is more of a byproduct of successful men.
On the other side of the coin, the evolutionary pressure on men is to protect women and ensure their happiness, because men's goal is to make women faithful to them. So from the start, women being happy is what men want.
@ceo_of_monoeye_dating @roboneko @icedquinn @Ashalam
So is the general idea that women on dating sites just happen to be far worse people than women in the general population?
One is that the men who remain on dating apps are actually uglier than the average, and that women who remain on dating apps are not.
One is that women who remain on dating apps have skewed ideas about male attractiveness.
One is that women can pick up on male desperation - and the most desperate men remain on the dating apps.
Each of those "sounds" right to at least someone. But they tell totally different stories. If anything, these sorts of statistics should be read as an argument for not using dating sites - they tell you a lot about the people who are on them.
@ceo_of_monoeye_dating @roboneko @icedquinn @Ashalam
>One is that the men who remain on dating apps are actually uglier than the average, and that women who remain on dating apps are not.
This is severe wishful thinking. It implies handsome men get enough action IRL that they don't need dating apps, but somehow beautiful women don't get enough action IRL?! Considering men are the chasers, and women the chasees, if anything it's gonna be beautiful women that have more than enough attention from men IRL that they don't need to use dating apps.
>One is that women who remain on dating apps have skewed ideas about male attractiveness.
This implies women have unrealistic expectations about men.
>One is that women can pick up on male desperation - and the most desperate men remain on the dating apps.
This is similar to your first interpretation, in that only the less desirable and thus desperate men use dating apps. If this was still 10-15 years ago, maybe I could still buy the "this is not representative of real world" argument, but dating apps have gone into mainstream years ago. And once again considering the chaser-chasee dynamic, if anything such hypothesis would fit better the women demographic. If anything you would expect there to be disproportionally more desperate women on dating sites, cause the non-desperate women simply get their attention from IRL.
Men are chasers, and chasers are gonna go wherever the pray lies. We already know from other studies that men are far more likely to date down than women are. And you don't even need studies to see that fact. Just look at the articles from women column writers that complain they can't find a man that is smarter, more educated, and makes more $ than them. They can't even think about dating someone with less social status then themselves.
But men don't have than hung up, and all too often we see men being perfectly accepting of dating down, or sometimes even desire it.
>This is severe wishful thinking. It implies handsome men get enough action IRL that they don't need dating apps, but somehow beautiful women don't get enough action IRL?!
It may also have been the case that mainly attractive men got selected out of the dating app pool (because they paired up with someone) and that the attractiveness of women had no impact on them being removed from the dating app pool. This makes some sense - on dating apps, men often match with everyone they can (so there is no selection for attractiveness) and women pick and choose (so there is some selection for attractiveness).
For the second:
>This implies women have unrealistic expectations about men.
It may also be that women who remain on dating apps are overly choosy - that they have overly high standards which are preventing them from pairing off with a mate.
For the third:
>This is similar to your first interpretation, in that only the less desirable and thus desperate men use dating apps.
I correct you here by saying that it suggests that only the less desirable men *remain* on dating apps. People who use the app, pair off, then delete the app are undersampled in this data.
I mainly want to make the point that there's a lot of ways to look at the data. I think it is wrong to draw broad conclusions from these graphs.
@ceo_of_monoeye_dating @roboneko @icedquinn @Ashalam
>It may also have been the case that mainly attractive men got selected out of the dating app pool (because they paired up with someone) and that the attractiveness of women had no impact on them being removed from the dating app pool. This makes some sense - on dating apps, men often match with everyone they can (so there is no selection for attractiveness) and women pick and choose (so there is some selection for attractiveness).
I love how your argument goes back to: men don't have unrealistic expectations about women, so they will match with everyone they can, while women have unrealistic expectations about men.
Besides, why would attractive men get selected so much easier out from the app dating pool, when, even if they don't have much expectations, they still need to pass the woman's expectations to get selected out. It's not like a man just swipes "yes" a hundred times and he gets guaranteed a date. There's still 2 levels of selection here: the less strict selection the man makes, and the strict one that women make.
An attractive women on the other hand... it's not exactly news that a beautiful women can pretty much have anyone she wants. She wont get much resistance once she picks someone.
And then there's also the issue of men being far more likely to date multiple women at the same time. So you'll have men stick around anyway to cheat. And let's be honest, it's not the unattractive men that get the privilege to play that game.
I simply don't see how there would be an imbalance, that favors eliminating handsome men from app dating pools but somehow favors beautiful women remain in place.
>It may also be that women who remain on dating apps are overly choosy - that they have overly high standards which are preventing them from pairing off with a mate.
Or in other words, women have unrealistic expectations about men.
> only the less desirable men *remain* on dating apps.
You're just doing useless word games at this point, and bad ones at that. The data simply shows distribution of people using dating apps at a point in time. You act like there's been some historical process that has magically eliminated ONLY the handsome men, that no undesirable men have given up dating or have stopped using dating apps for various reasons, that no undesirable men have improved themselves to be more desirable, or that no new desirable men have entered or returned to the dating pool. The reality is that the dating pool is always dynamic, in that people come and go, but the demographic distributions are gonna stay similar, because that's how things tend to compensate over time.
