hot take/rant
I don't think the majority of parents actually love their children. The way I see children being treated does not reflect how you should act toward someone you love. During the pandemic it was incredibly bad, and you could see abuse rates rising because of it but also I heard parents constantly complaining about their children being home instead of at school. They just want to send them away to teachers to make it their problem. I think that sure, on the surface parents love their kids and provide for them and all of that, but I don't think they really know what it means to love someone. They just leave them alone to their own devices, let other people and programs raise them, and are completely complacent on anything that hasn't been culturally hammered into them. That's the best case scenario. I experienced this as a child too (as did my siblings) and it wrecked me which, by extension, hurt others. There are things I'm still trying to remedy and things that I may never be able to. I think that's how we get where we are today, culturally speaking. Lots of hate and resentment, for others and for ourselves, because action wasn't taken when it should have been for a whole slew of reasons: it's too inconvenient, it'll make you look like a bad person, that's not what everyone else acts like or is doing, etc. That all festers up and for some people it eats them to the point of losing themselves, and for some absolutely abhorrent reason we support that culturally. Whether it's to say is "normal" or to laugh at for being abnormal.
hot take/rant
@beardalaxy kids aren't really designed to be tolerated 24/7, they're needy and selfish and unless you outsource their development to the 3rd party at least for several hours, be so school or their own siblings, even a very loving parent's patience is going to run out very fast
hot take/rant
@tomie that's not 100% what i'm getting at. like obviously parents should have some time to themselves every once in a while. in that situation it is when it becomes a bit more vitriolic and they like, despise being around their kids. but what i'm more talking about is that a lot of parents seem like that's the majority of what they do, outsourcing their parenting and then being shocked when their kids are fucked up. but then, they don't help their kids with how fucked up they are, they either outsource that too or they just sweep it under the rug. when my parents found out i was cutting they dropped me off at a therapist (who sucked ass) and that was that, pretty much. nothing changed. same thing happened to my other siblings and i've heard similar sorts of things from a lot of my friends. then there were times i'd get in trouble but the only solution was to ground me for a week or talk to the clergy. nothing actually changed. it was all just really vapid. the one therapist my siblings had who actually tried to make some change happen at the household, they stopped going to.
from my experience this stuff is relatively common, unfortunately :(
hot take/rant
@tomie and I don't have any data to back this up or anything, that's why it's a hot take lol. It's just from my own experience and hearing other people's experiences, plus talking with friends that actually did have great parents and hearing their perspectives on things like this.
@beardalaxy
This take is so cold that it would fit perfectly into Batman and Robin.