JazzFLASH @Jazzy_Butts@gameliberty.club

Imagine this, ok, the perfect love story, a college professor starts dating a MINOR, and she's like WAY minor, like 12, and they fall IN LOVE, and he NEVER does anything sexual with her, and he's there for her and they stay together for 6 years and on her 18th birthday they cuddle and snuggl and kiss and make out 🥺

I want to nonsexually date minors since it's legal. Need to find a minor who has parents who give them permission to go out, and then we can go on a date without worrying about anyone getting upset. We'll go on camping trips, sportsball stadiums, nerd conventions, spa resorts, I'll be the best boyfriend, and NO SEX will occur until they're of LEGAL AGE, and that's paradise! They can't stop that! They never tell you!

@ube Do you ever get urges to rub your dick with another guys dick covered in lube when stoned, because I do...ever since I could remember, pot unlocks the gay in me....makes me way gay.

Goodnight nibgrahs of the homeslice variety
Clasia: GET THE FUCK INSIDE JAZZY GOD DAMNIT
Shit sorry guys I told her to take care of me because I've been out of it I have to het back in quick *runs inside*

*runs up rubs stinky smeg head on your upper lip*
Claudia: *runs out after me* GOD DAMNIT JAZZY, I'M SORRY HE'S HAVING AN EPISODE, JAZZY!!! *chases after me and drags me back home*

I'm asking Claudia to speak for me.
Claudia: Jazzy says he is tired.*taps cigarette ash into ashtray*, he needs his rest, although I am incapable of joy I do feel satisfaction in knowing I'm better than his ex, "Psychic Girlfriend", that's not even a character name, *drags off cig*, at least I got a name, bitch. Anyway Jazzy is fucking tired. He said he'll be up later. *Shuts door, you hear her yell up the stairs before you make your way back home* "OK BABE I TOLD 'EM, I NEED MORE SMOKES TOMORROW!! YES, I KNOW, SURE, YES, I LOVE YOU TOO. NO I DON'T KNOW WHERE IT IS..." etc.

I've been freaking the fuck out and having an existential crisis ever since I've learned that there is a very finite amount of books that a single person can read in their single lifetime because you can only read so fast and even the fastest reader can only read so many books so can you guys please for the love of God any of you who still give a damn about Jazzy like talk me down because I'm freaking the fuck out about this I am freaking the fuck out about fomo /vent

I wish I had enough money that I could have all kinds of different girlfriends and protect them and they would all go and be happy and say wow we really love dating Jazzy because I wouldn't just be a loser I would be really generous with my care and I would take good care of all my girlfriends and they would all be safe and they could go on all kinds of trips to wherever they wanted to go and they would go and get college degrees wherever they wanted to go and that they would have my full and total support

I still wish I had an asian girlfriend and a white girlfriend and a black girlfriend and an eskimo girlfriend and and aboriginal girlfriend and an indian girlfriend and an arab girlfriend and a slavic girlfriend and an english girlfriend and a germanic girlfriend and a mayan girlfriend and an incan girlfriend and a polynesian girlfriend and all the other girlfriends that I forgot to mention

I wish I could divide myself up into multiple physical entities and also multiply my brains comprehension so that I could send one me to play videogames 24/7, one me to masturbate 24/7, one me to work out 24/7, and one me to do the rest of the stuff, and we would all come back together, just like multiple man. I do not have enough fucking time for all the shit I want to do god damnit. How can I be a naturalist, a porn lover and masturbater, a playboy, a gamer, a movie buff, a comic nerd, a trekkie, a fitness enthusiast, a self taught chef, a marksman, a horseback rider, a bibliophile, an illustrator, a musician, a pilot, a boat captain, an inventor, a programmer, a translator, a wilderness guide, a hang-gliding instructor, a stuntman, all these things and more... I'm upset I'll never have the time to do them all before my clock is up, all out of spring power.............on god.....oh god I need a breast to cry on............oh god

Dude is this retard abuse? Like is this dude retarded? Can he consent?
https://youtu.be/YV8yuXKtPvY

My mom who should know better because she's a genXer not a fucking boomer but she was dumb enough to get smart tv shit and lost the remote and couldn't use her damn tv without it. She refuses to get a simple old craptop hdmi streaming setup, that's too "complicated".

@icedquinn I don't want to be one of the purity ring dads who has a mock wedding with his daughter and talks about her virginity that's so cringe

I want to go on legal dates with minors. Movies, ice cream, picnic in the park, visit to the museum, ahhhh, it would be the time of our lives.../fantasy

I double checked and it's still legal in my state for someone over 18 to go on a date, or date steadily, someone under 18, as long as no sexual activity takes place. This is so based.

If multiverse theory is real there's a multiverse where I've fucked you all in the butts

Let's watch some cartoons now that evil has been defeated
https://youtu.be/qSupVNHI00I

ABSORB THE FASCISTS SPIRITUAL ENERGY AND CONVERT IT BACK INTO UNIVERSALLY PURE ENERGY

THE TIME IS NOW, MEDITATE NOW, TAKE A MOMENT AND FOCUS, ON EVAPORATING THE FASCISTS, FASCISTS EVAPORATE....***NOW***

I realize now the only way for us CHOSEN ONES to find each other is to NOT BE RACIST, because only like TEN of us are born to each race, and like HALF of them are going to be on the bad side, so bro, we've gotta stop being racist or we're Never going to find each other.