I hate when people are like "How you doing? How you been?", I used to do this myself, and it's so fucking annoying and I realized that and stopped. Now, instead of trying to manipulate people into entertaining me by asking them zero effort questions like "How ya doin??". I now know to OFFER them something, I say, "Hey, I'm doing X, it reminds me of Y and I like it because Z. What do you think of X?". It shows I'm willing to share, that I'm not low in confidence or filled with shame or shyness, lets you get to know me, and shows that I have a will to do things, and have something going on inside my head.
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Fiction/Fantasy
I'm so tired, I worry that if I even do get a gf when she says "hey let's have sex" I'll say "I'm too tired" and then she'll go out and get bbc tyrone to fuck her, and she'll bring him into MY home into MY bed while I'M THERE, and they'll FORCE ME TO WATCH, while his disgusting overlarge black penis hurts her and she says 'ow', and if I don't stare intently I'll be punished with slaps to the penis.
I haven't fapped at all yesterday, and I haven't fapped today...I checked my weiner and it still gets hard on command so that's not it, am I broken or am I healing? I just haven't had the urge to fap, I have "things to do" (I hear people say that but idk what they mean by it, I mean I have to clean my home and wash dishes and stuff)
"In a particularly egregious case, he was told that his attractions made him ineligible to receive support from a helpline for survivors, even after he explained that he had been abused." https://prostasia.org/blog/bad-survivors-healing-myth/
Project ended.
Project status: Failure
Debrief complete.