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Personal story about Christianity/religion 

@beardalaxy
That was really hard to read.
I am so sorry for you.

I myself have experienced the problem of forcing myself to do something, that was killing my soul in this way, and making me sick. For about 3 years, I felt sick trying to finish university, but writing a "well researched 50 pages long scientific paper" I knew would be read by 2 people, was driving me insane.

And that was purely based on futility, not based on existential fear on that level. So, that had to be unimaginable.

Thank you for sharing.
Is your comunity now better?

Being disgusted with organized religion and the normies who cleave to it is normal, sane, and correct. Of course you’re disgusted by it. It’s disgusting. Priests and other religious authorities being corrupt is the norm throughout history. As you grow, the more you ponder, what we think we understand, where we think we came from, what we we think we’re doing, the more you understand that we’ve been lied to, by every institution. What makes you think that the religious institutions are the only ones that have never been touched?

This exact topic gets discussed in scriptures extensively, and that’s even within the confines of the canonized scriptures that Orthodoxy recognizes. We don’t need to venture into the apocrypha, various Gnostic texts, or Mormon scripture to arrive at this conclusion, although those also discuss this in even more detail. I guess some good bits slipped through the cracks of their ecumenical censors, huh?

So the trap to be wary of in this mess, is that just because idiot normies who go to church out of social convention or because they want to be told that even though they’re broke and resented that jebus still loves them are misguided and often irritating, doesn’t mean that God is fake or that these scriptures are totally lacking in merit. In fact, it’s also scriptural that the Devil, Satan, Lucifer, or whichever name you prefer for the adversary, makes a habit of putting very wicked, very venal people in positions of moral authority… over you. The archons manipulate us all from every angle and hope to convince us to one of many paths to ruin.

@LukeAlmighty It’s real and why some people never come to Christianity. One has to come to Christianity out of love and truth. Otherwise it is like beating oneself over the head with a 2x4. One sees this with American Christians. Some of the most bizarre and laughably evil things I have ever heard irl came from Christians talking about very serious issues, from suffering and evil to the state of israel and stuff. They seem like broken people. Jews seem like more honest people than them, it can make atheism and libtardism seem very attractive to the average person. I accept Christians as part of my tribe, but I have trouble accepting the doctrine and I don’t always ‘feel’ it.
It felt more real as a child. As a Boy Scout, I went to chapel at camp. It was my only experience with Christianity until adulthood, and it was very basic: Wooden benches facing a pulpit in the open air, on a ledge overlooking a cliff. We sang songs, leaders would tell stories with good lessons. I loved it and it was a very happy time. The only time I’ve been happy at church. I don’t see it replicated elsewhere. Instead I see autism. Cold, distant, almost hostile. Like enemy territory. I don’t open up to them. It’s anti-cozy.
It’s almost soulless. It hurts. That is what I would say. I get what you’re saying. Sorry if that is too personal.
@LukeAlmighty the god of abraham is a deeply insecure and mean spirited child with less emotional maturity than the average adult male. there are a lot of good principles in the abrahamic religions but their conception of their god has always repulsed me.

@Jazzy_Butts
What are you talking about? I have Jehova's whitnesses 100m away from my door. It's the current christians that push me away so hard.

@momo
Are you sure?
Deus Vult and indulgences do sound kind of like they did.

There is one fundamental problem I cannot get over. There are obviously christians, who take christianity through a spiritual lense. And I do understand that kind of a religion.

But... I have been listening to christian apologists ever since I was a child. And I know, that this kind of a god was NOT what they were talking about. Neither the first mover nor the Pascal's vager are connected to the inner beauty of the world. The eternal hell I was promised and get threatened by is not connected to the inner piece this connection can bring.

So, even if I accepted this God, I still could never call myself a christian. Because I know, that it does describe something different, then what I would mean.

And yes, it is a problem, that I simply cannot get over. I feel disgust whenever I hear christian language. I will pray for you is closer to an insult then a greatful act.

Have you ever heard of this problem before? What do you think?

@DrRyanSkelton @ChristiJunior
Oh... I consider myself a libertarian, and I definitelly didn't get that one :D

They're trying to suss out if you are a libertarian but they're retarded and do not understand the argument for libertarianism. (I'm not sure I do either but I understand it way better than these retards)

When a person get's depressed, they don't usually tell anyone, but there are signs.

@ChristiJunior
Also, he's not just "benevolent". Benevolent is still a term, that allows for imperfection.

But this guy is literally "morally correct".

@picandor
I know.... But it is a seriously funny question when phrased this way.

@Jazzy_Butts @picandor @beardalaxy
Oh, they are a problem, and being trans is extremely bad.

I just don't blame them.

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